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Thursday, August 28, 2008

I can't wait to see your comments (so be sure to leave some!)

So a few blogs ago I asked advice about what kind of stroller to get and I was so excited to get so many people letting me know what they thought that I decided I would come to you all again for some more motherly advice. Here are some of the things I am worried about giving birth/having a child and I would LOVE to hear from anyone who happens to look at this blog (even if I don't know you) to see what your advice is. (you can answer all of the questions, or just a few if there are too many)

1. How long did your first labor last?
2. Did you end up having to use pitocin to get it going?
3. Did the pitocin make it hurt worse?
4. How long until you felt like you were "recovered" from child birth?
5. How long did nursing hurt for?
6. Does your body go back to normal after baby #1? How long does it take?
7. How long until your baby slept through the night?
8. How long until the baby slept in his/her crib in a different room?
9. Did you feel cooped up and/or bored at home after the baby was born?
10.How many of you had emergency c-sections? (I am wondering what % of people have to have one)

I know these are a lot of questions, but these are things I have been sitting around worrying about the last little while. Trust me, I have about a million other questions besides these. I am just feeling a little anxious about the unknown and want every mom on earth to open upand tell me everything they know about having a kid. I know they say your instincts just "kick in" after you have a kid, but just in case mine take awhile to jump start, I want to know what I'm headed for.

18 comments:

AmberN225 said...

Oh Fun!! Okay,
1- first labor was 7 hours
2- yes, I was induced by choice a week early because I was moving 4 weeks later and doc said my body was ready and he was comfortable with it.
3- with #1 I got the epidural as soon as labor really got going (2 or 3 hours in) and from there I was good to go - it was awesome regardless of the pitocin (which they turned off anyways once I got going). With #2 - also induced via pit - I got my epidural right before they broke my water and then right about when transition started the epidural started wearing off and they couldn't get it to kick back in. For about 30 minutes it got worse and worse and then there was about 20 minutes of crazy insane pain - but they were trying to have him come out as fast as they could because the cord had been around his neck and his heartrate was dropping - so even though it was hurting me, they cranked up the pitocin full blast for the last hour to help him out. So, it sped up the labor super intense but then all of the sudden it was over and it didn't even matter anymore - I forgot all about it instantly.
4 - able to function regular again was about 2 weeks, maybe a little more the 1st time around, but has gotten quicker each time but complete recovery . . . its hard to say because your body is never really the same and then you also have to factor in sleep loss & stuff . . .
5 - the first time around nursing never really hurt much - I don't know why? With #2 he got thrush in his mouth and it transferred to me - that hurt crazy bad until we treated it, but that was the only 'hurt'. With #3 I got my first nursing blister the 2nd day - it was wierd, and hurt, but it only lasted like a day and then things were good.
6 - I never got as skinny as I used to be, but I was pregnant again when my 1st was only 6 months old . . . so maybe I'm not a good person to ask :). After #2 I went almost 2 years, and still didn't get as skinny. I did get within 10 pounds or so - but I was still built differently. Your hips widen and I don't know if they ever go back. Mine won't - but maybe someone elses will?
7 - baby #1 slept her first 8 hour night at 3 months and then worked towards making it a habit. #2 had really bad reflux and we couldn't even find a medicine that would make him feel comfortable until he was 6 months old. Nights with him were so so hard, but hopefully you won't have that. #3 slept an 8 hour night at 3 weeks, and by a month old, was doing it every night!! The advice I got that seemed to make it all work out was to feed her just a little more frequently during the day. My kids have all gone 4 hours between feedings, but one day I decided to try out the advice and I fed her every 3 hours - that very night she slept 8 hours! I couldn't believe it, but I totally recommend the idea if you are looking for a bigger chunk of nighttime sleep.
8 - I like having my kiddo around. I have kept them all in my room until 9 or 10 months, but I don't wake up from them being in there unless they need me, so it's not a problem. I know that some people sleep better with baby in the other room.
9 - I didn't feel cooped up, I went out and did a lot of stuff, I just felt like it was a huge process to leave the house. If you are breastfeeding, and if you'd like to feel more confident to leave the house, I recommend practicing nursing with some kind of cover on right from the first few days so that you feel like you can nurse in public. If you can do that, you're good to go anywhere as long as you can go at your own pace. Oh, and you also have to be prepared for your own body. You get tired pretty fast at first, and you bleed for like a month. I don't think you really feel bored though because you have this beautiful baby who you can look at all the time, and who also needs a lot of stuff from you so you stay pretty busy.
10 - No c-sections yet

Well, that was probably more than you were hoping for. I love to talk 'baby'. Goodluck feeling prepared. I think the more stories you read about what could possibly happen, the better off you are just because you know how so many of the 'what-ifs' play out. And every story is different in some way.

Good luck!!

Russell said...

1. How long did your first labor last? About 8 hrs.
2. Did you end up having to use pitocin to get it going? Yes, but 30 mins into it the baby's heart rate dropped so they took me off.
3. Did the pitocin make it hurt worse? No, get an epidural... I can't recommend it highly enough!!!
4. How long until you felt like you were "recovered" from child birth? Physically... about 3 weeks, but I was so scared of going out... scared that the baby would catch some disease or something, so I didn't really do much for about 5 weeks after he was born.
5. How long did nursing hurt for? About a month, maybe 6 weeks. BUY LANOLIN!!!!!
6. Does your body go back to normal after baby #1? How long does it take? He's 3 months old and I have 3 lbs left to lose. I don't know if my abs will ever look the same though :(
7. How long until your baby slept through the night? HAHAHAHA.... everyone told me that he'd be sleeping through the night at 6 weeks, we're still not there though. If he gets up just once during the night, it's a great night for us.
8. How long until the baby slept in his/her crib in a different room? I just barely moved him! I tried moving him to the crib at 2 months, then I went through withdrawals and moved him back to my room. Last night was our first attempt for take 2.
9. Did you feel cooped up and/or bored at home after the baby was born? NO!! Just stare at your baby all day long. They don't stay little for very long. So don't clean, don't cook, don't do anything. Just stare at him!! This time is so precious!
10.How many of you had emergency c-sections? (I am wondering what % of people have to have one)Not me.

I'm so excited for you! My very fondest and sweetest memories are when Cade, Russ and I were in the hospital together and during those first few weeks. Don't be nervous. Being a mom is the best thing ever.

Russell said...

By the way, that was from Chelsea, not Russell :)

ollie said...

1. How long did your first labor last?
12 hours -- but I truly and honestly have very easy labors. My sister-in-law goes a lot longer and they are really really bad. But one thing is for sure, an epidural no matter how easy or how hard your labor is makes any pain go away! I had an epidural when I had Kelly and didn't feel a thing. I didn't have one with Isabelle simply because I wasn't afraid of labor anymore and was ready for the challenge (plus my labor pain isn't that bad). There was NO way I could have done it the first time without the epidural just because I was too scared of the unknown.

2. Did you end up having to use pitocin to get it going?
I didn't with Kelly, my water broke and then everything went really fast. With Isabelle, I wasn't progressing fast enough, so they did give me some pitocin.

3. Did the pitocin make it hurt worse?
YES! And it was instant! I went from taking a nice nap (yes, I was taking a nap during "active" labor) to very intense pain. Just ask your doctor what they will do if they have to give you pitocin. Some doctors are cool with giving you an epidural right away, some are not. You really just need to know what your doctor is going to do so that way you can plan ahead how to deal with it.

4. How long until you felt like you were "recovered" from child birth?
18 months -- but my story is different from most. Between constant illness, a baby that didn't sleep, and post-partum depression, can you really expect to recover very fast?

5. How long did nursing hurt for?
The whole 3 months I did it. I made several mistakes on top of other factors that i could not control: I didn't discover that I had inverted nipples (too much information, I know) until after I gave birth. So when my little girl who was the LAZIEST sucker (not all babys dig all of the work that nursing makes you do) it was not happening. She was totally unable to latch on. And that's where my mistakes started. The first mistake I made was not asking for help in the very beginning from a caring friend who had a lot of experience with nursing. I read all of the books, but never asked for help. There was a really crappy lactation consultant at the hospital that took one look at the situation and just shoved a nusing shield in my face. I know you probably don't know what that is, but it looks like a plastic nipple. Anyway, it's totally of the devil. Don't use it if they give it to you! Pump or something else if you have to. You can call me if you have more questions about it. But my BIGGEST mistake was not ending breastfeeding sooner. Now I'm not saying that you shouldn't breast feed, I'm just saying it wasn't for me or for my health. It truly was making me sick. From week one I had clogged ducts every day (which really hurt) and mastitis 6 times in three months. It wasn't until my OBGYN told me I had to stop because I was forming an abcess. It doesn't always work and that's okay. I think if I had had better help in the beginning that maybe it would have, but who knows. Every person's body is different and every baby is different. Don't beat yourself up if you have trouble with nursing. I didn't nurse Isabelle at ALL and she is way healthier than Kelly. Go figure.

6. Does your body go back to normal after baby #1? How long does it take?
For most women, it does not go back to normal -- ever. Your body is just different after having a baby. Some women are really lucky that it totally goes back, but I was not that woman. But I say embrace it!

7. How long until your baby slept through the night?
Kelly -- 4 years Isabelle -- 2 years

8. How long until the baby slept in his/her crib in a different room?
6 months

9. Did you feel cooped up and/or bored at home after the baby was born?
YES! I know some people just love hangin' out with their babies but I really really really felt cooped up. I'm sooooo not a baby person, so it wasn't as much fun for me. Luckily for you, you have your sister-in-law to hang out with. Also, I know some people say the mothering instinct kicks in right away. For some, yes. For me, no. It took a really long time. That's okay though, because everybody is different. The big thing is that you're more than prepared. I had only changed a diaper ONE time before Kelly was born, and I did it wrong! lol! I kinda slacked on the whole "preparing" for the baby thing.

10.How many of you had emergency c-sections? (I am wondering what % of people have to have one)
none

Josh and Shyann Croke Family said...

I'll only answer the questions I can answer. Some don't apply.
1. 24 hours, I won't give details. It's a horror story you don't want to hear, but I had an unusual problem that made contractions 10 times worse than normal and I felt every one up until 10 centimeters. Don't worry, if you had the same problem you would have already had the baby. I've heard epidurals are great.
4. A couple months.
5. Never, probably because I had to pump the first 2 months.
6. I went back to normal within a couple weeks. Not normal, but mine was early so I didn't have the last couple months of weight gain.
7. 1 year 7 months. Don't ask me for sleeping advice. I'm obviously not qualified.
8. 2 months
9. Sometimes, yes. The first few months weren't that bad because I was so busy with the baby, but after a while there were days that were boring. Get a hobby, take a day off for yourself once in a while.
10.I had an emergency c-section at 32 weeks. Not recommended. Hopefully you won't have to.

christa said...

1. How long did your first labor last? I was in the hospital for 10 hours with Eva so I guess that counts as labor, for Elle it was only 4 hours of obvious labor.
2. Did you end up having to use pitocin to get it going?I had PIT with both girls.
3. Did the pitocin make it hurt worse? Yes, PIT is the devil. It makes your contractions stronger longer, harder and your baby feels all three of those things too.
4. How long until you felt like you were "recovered" from child birth? 2 weeks
5. How long did nursing hurt for? With Eva it hurt a lot then I just pumped. With Elle I was semi sore for like a week maybe, but I knew how to do it with from the non-experience with Eva. I'm with Ollie, if you want to nurse, get a lactation specialst, as hardcore as the La Leche Leauge ladies are they will help you get it until you get it.
6. Does your body go back to normal after baby #1? How long does it take? At around 2 weeks with Eva I was getting into jeans I couldn't even wear before I was pregnant (I lost 10lbs on top of losing all the baby weight)Same with Elle, I lost all the baby weight plus 15lbs with Elle. My stomach was still flabby feeling till around 6 weeks.
7. How long until your baby slept through the night? With Eva is was around 6 weeks, 6-7 hours a night. And Elle, I think it was closer to 8 weeks, 6-7 hours a night. If you only have to wake up once at night, it feels like sleeping all night.
8. How long until the baby slept in his/her crib in a different room?I think Elle was around 2-3 months. Eva was a different situation, we all had one room @ my parents, so not till after she was 1 when we moved out.
9. Did you feel cooped up and/or bored at home after the baby was born? I loved it with Eva, I watched my favorite movies all day long, I went wherever I wanted with Eva, it was SO fun. Elle was harder, I didn't really get out of the house with both of them till Elle was around 10months
10.How many of you had emergency c-sections? none here, I'm SO glad too!!

ollie said...

Of course we're going! We want to meet the new baby!

thecamps said...

1.first labor lasted about 15 hours then it was an emergency c-section
2. yes we had to use poticin as well
3. the only thing poticin did for me was make me puke it didn't agree with me nor the baby.
4. gee I don't think I am yet recovered from child birth lol actually it was like 3-6 weeks somewhere in there
5. it hurt for a few weeks it's PAINFUL at first but my body didn't produce it and I dried out in 3 weeks with out a choice!!
6. My body seemed to be normal after your face and feet unswell like instantly it doesn't take too long.
7. How long until your baby slept through the night?
8. My first baby slept in a basinet just in our room for about a month then we put her in her room and she slept through the night after bout 7 weeks..my 2nd child on the other hand didn't sleep throught the night til she was 14 months old.
9. I love being at home it's amazing the bond you'll get when you are home and it's easier to go do things with just one kid vs 2 or 3
10.I had one emergency c-section and my 2nd was c-section by choice..c-sections are not what everyone makes them out to be I have talked to many people and they would prefer a c-section vs a vaginal just because it's fast short and to the point and you heal faster..at least that was my experience..
Good luck to you now when you have your baby you should answer these questions as well i'm interested how your delivery will turn out...Good luck to you guys elliots cuz shannon

Kari said...

1. How long did your first labor last? 33 Hours. Yes, you read that right.

2. Did you end up having to use pitocin to get it going? Yes. The epidural stopped my labor.

3. Did the pitocin make it hurt worse? Couldn't feel it. LOVE the epidural.

4. How long until you felt like you were "recovered" from child birth? Til I had all my energy back? Not until she was a year. Til I was healed down there, 3 months.

5. How long did nursing hurt for? In the beginning, like the first owie-ness of it,2 months. But with mastitis it was the entire time.

6. Does your body go back to normal after baby #1? How long does it take? Mine did for the most part. The hips moving back into place took the longest and was about a month.

7. How long until your baby slept through the night? HA! Mine sometimes still doesn't sleep through the night and she's 2. It didn't happen regularly until she was 18 months. Some of us have all the luck.

8. How long until the baby slept in his/her crib in a different room? I started trying to get her to do that at 3 months. It didn't stick until 9 months.

9. Did you feel cooped up and/or bored at home after the baby was born? Cooped up, yes. Bored, no. Always things to read.

10.How many of you had emergency c-sections? (I am wondering what % of people have to have one)
Did not have one.

eric and girls said...

Hey Tracy this is Elliot's cousin Sandy. I dropped by your blog and I thought I would answer some questions for you.
1. My first labor was 20 hours. I pushed for 4 and then they litterally pulled her out.
2. I honestly can't remember having pitocin. If I did it must have been little cause it obviously didn't leave an impression on me.
3. Can't remember if I had it
4. I had a 4th degree tear with my first. (if you don't know what it is look it up.) It's very painful and it took about 3 months for me to even sit on my behind comfortably.
5. Nursing never hurt or was a problem for me.
6. After baby #1 I lost a lot of weight fast thaks to nursing. However, my body had definately been re-sculptured. As far as baby # 2, yeah that never happened.
7. Both of mine were about 8 weeks. Then when they started teething it was a whole other story.
8. They were both about 8 weeks when they slept in different rooms.
9. I felt trapped in my house more so with the 2nd cause I had a nasty c-section. I felt as if the world was still going about it's usual business and I had come to a complete standstill. I literally sat in my chair in the family room and watched the grass grow. Exciting I know.
10. With the first they wanted to do an emergency c-section, but I was too stubborn and said no cause I had already been in labor for so long and I wanted to finish it. However, due to my 4th degree tear the 2nd and whatever children I will have in the future will all have to be born via a c-section. Let's just say if I have another
4th degree tear I could have bowel movements whenever they decided to happen.
Don't worry if you should have a "horror" birth you do forget about all that down the road. My children's births were very difficult and here I am almost 10 weeks pregnant and ready to do it all again.

Erica said...

Both of my labors were really easy and almost enjoyable...here's my rundown:

1. How long did your first labor last? R:6 hours; L:4 1/2 hours
2. Did you end up having to use pitocin to get it going? Was induced with both, so yes to PIT
3. Did the pitocin make it hurt worse? I don't know the difference. I suppose yes. The contractions are long and constant and hard. But I got an epidural 15-20 mins after the drip started, so it was never unbearable for me.
4. How long until you felt like you were "recovered" from child birth? Pain wise, less than a week with both. Sex wise, 6 weeks, and even then, sex still hurt, with both
5. How long did nursing hurt for? R: 3 months; L: 2 weeks
6. Does your body go back to normal after baby #1? How long does it take? Lost all the weight after 2 weeks. The hips didn't go back to normal until 4 or 5 months later
7. How long until your baby slept through the night? R: 6 months L: 2 weeks
8. How long until the baby slept in his/her crib in a different room? 4 months for both
9. Did you feel cooped up and/or bored at home after the baby was born? No. I love staring at my baby and I was out of the house by day 3 with both, leaving Allen or my mom with the baby.
10.How many of you had emergency c-sections?
No c-sections here.

Don't worry too much about it. The baby will come out of you one way or another. You can't really do anything to change that fact. I say just go into it all relaxed and ready to see your baby. Let your baby and doctors do the rest of the worrying and the work.

Alyson said...

1. 48 hours (at least)for #1, 3-4 hours for #2
2.,3. no pitocin
4. With my first i felt recovered after about a month, i had a really bad tear. with my second, i was fine within a couple days.
5. nursing hurt for a few days at the most. If you are doing it right, it shouldnt be more than that.
6. I lost all my baby weight plus some within probably 6 months, but my body never did, or ever will go back to "normal" too many saggy parts. :(
7. slept through the night by about 8 months.
8. slept in there own room at about 3 months.
9. i felt very bored and couped up with my first, but you make yourself get comfortable with a new way of life and i had to get out of the house everyday then i was fine. I am still the same way, everyone is different.
10. no c-section

Sara said...

Hi Sister Parker! :) I'm sooooo happy I found you on Facebook! I still think about your every now and then and wonder what you're up to. Now we can be blogging buddies! :) I have all my labor details on my blog if you want to read about them. I had our son in November of 2006 so you can go back and look in the "archives" and read about it if you want. But off the top of my head I'll answer most of your questions. You hear a lot of women say that they forget after awhile what the pain was like and details you thought you'd never forget. It's true! Ok from when I started first feeling contractions to when the baby was fully out was close to 15 hours. I had contractions at home for about 2 hours (I think my blog has better details for that). I don't think I had pitocin. Contractions and dilating were coming along slowly but surely. When you first get to the hospital (when you think you're having contractions or whatever), they give you a gown and then you get in a hospital bed and then they check your cervix to see what you're dilated at. They will check you an hour later to see if you've made progress. If you have, they will admit you to stay, if not, they will probably send you home. As soon as my hour was up, I got my epidural! It was awesome and I highly recommend it. I was actually surprised how fast I felt ok afterwards. I was definitely swollen down there but it seems like within a week, I went shopping with my mom. Nursing wasn't hard for me. It did hurt the first day or so for me. I was really lucky though I think. I think nursing is different (as labor and delivery is) for everyone. For losing the weight, I gained about 35 lbs. I thought it would be easy for it to just come off so I didn't proactively do anything until last Christmastime (I still weighed the same as the day I delivered and it had been a year! Gross). I exercised and ate better and lost 30 lbs. by April. Now I'm pregnant again so bring on the weight again! ;) Lawson was sleeping through the night by a month old. Get the book "On Becoming Babywise-- Giving your baby the gift of sleep." It's an excellent book. My sister-in-law had success with it as well. It helps you get your baby on a schedule. We had him in a bassinet by our bed for a little bit and I can't quite remember when we started putting him in his crib. I went back to work after 6 weeks, which was kinda hard. If you feel cooped up, see if your ward has a mothers' group. Find some girls who are in the same situation as you. I've been doing that, and it's been so fun! Last question, I didn't have a c-section, thankfully. I hope you're doing great! I'm excited you're having a baby! Hope this info helps! :)

Zach 'n' Jack said...

First Labor? 12 hours, ended in a c-section.
Induced? Yes, I went 2 weeks over and was induced with pitocin; I never dilated past a 4. My body isn't made to have babies naturally.
Hurt worse? Heck yeah. Pitocin is the devil's medicine. But it helps. Wanted to go natural; made it 10 hours (with maxed out pitocin) before I couldn't stay on top of the pitocin-crazy contractions. With #2, I had a scheduled c-section. Sweet.
Recovered? I'm not a good comparison unless you have a c-section. With both of my boys though, I felt pretty good by about a month.
Nursing? Maybe a month. It was easier the 2nd time around for sure, because you know what you are doing. Don't buy lanolin, the hospital gives it to you, and you don't use much anyway. I only used it the first week. It's better to let a little milk dry on you after they eat.
Body back to normal? It's different for everyone. It was about 2-3 months for me. Normal is relative; I weigh the same as before I got prego, but my body is not the same. Your abs will never recover.
Sleeping at night? Both of them slept throuh the night (as in, they ate at 11pm, and made it until about 5 am) by 2 months (give or take). But Keegan ended up being pretty sick his first year, so we had a lot of sleepless nights with him. Kayden has been my perfect sleeper. nothing wakes him.
How long until out of my room? OH man. 3 weeks tops. I can't stand sleeping with them in the room. THEY ARE SO NOISY. Plus, with them in the room, I was so paranoid about every noise they made I never slept. I moved them into the hall outside our door really quickly. Definitely no longer for me than 3 weeks.
Cooped up? I'm not your average person for that either. With both of the boys, by 3 weeks old we had Zach's family with us. We took them all over the place. I was exhausted and sore, but it was still fun. I enjoyed the next few weeks of break after they left. They change so fast, and just going grocery shopping is a huge deal to schedule around nursing times. It's not bad.
Emergency c-sections? Only with keegan. He couldn't handle the heavy contractions I was having on the pitocin and his heart rate would bottom out with every contraction. The doc was coming and checking the monitors every few minutes. When he said "c-section" I was in the OR within 10 minutes. It was a little scary, but everything turned out fine. And now I just schedule my c-sections, which isn't too bad.

I'm excited for you, and I know how you feel. I freaked out around this time, I called mom and told her I wasn't going to have the baby. She said "uhh, too late." It's so fun and so worth everything you go through. I love my boys more than anything.

Zach 'n' Jack said...

ps, i did have postpartum depression with kayden (baby #2). Don't be afraid to tell your doc if you are feeling on edge, or overwhelmed, or just bummed. It's better to ask them about it and get their perspective. I waited 6 months, and I wish I had talked to them earlier!

Darin & Misty Ralphs said...

Of course I love giving advice, so here is mine, but you have to know every experience is different. I am answering this about my first kid (abigail) I am still experiencing some of these things with my twins.
1. How long did your first labor last? 12 hours
2. Did you end up having to use pitocin to get it going? Yes, I was one week over due.
3. Did the pitocin make it hurt worse? Not really, but I didn't really know the difference, since that was my first labor.
4. How long until you felt like you were "recovered" from child birth? completly recovered 8 weeks
5. How long did nursing hurt for? my first baby refused to nurse. My twins hurt alot for about 3 months.
6. Does your body go back to normal after baby #1? NO nothing has been the same since. How long does it take? I am still wondering the answer to that question.
7. How long until your baby slept through the night? 10 months
8. How long until the baby slept in his/her crib in a different room? The first night I brought her home. I would just lay her down and she would fall asleep, newborn babies are really sleepy.She got used to that and knew that was the place she slept.
9. Did you feel cooped up and/or bored at home after the baby was born? A little cooped up, not bored, you will be busy. I had to find some time to do something I liked and that helped.
10.How many of you had emergency c-sections? (I am wondering what % of people have to have one)I had a 12 hour labor, my epidural went got into my blood stream and then I had an emergency c-section. I was a little traumatized about my whole birthing experience, which is why I waited about three years to get pregnant again, my second experience was much better. Good luck Tracy.

AmberN225 said...

I only read about 1/2 the other comments, but I definitely second Jackie on the post-pardum thing. It is so real and so big of a deal - but also so easy to think you're just bad at the whole mom-thing or get down on yourself or whatever. I should've gotten help after #2, but didn't. After #3 I did and it has made me so much healthier and able to do what I need to do.

As for this question you sent me:
"How was it having the second baby so quickly after?"
It wasn't planned, so at first I totally freaked out. I would say that the first year or so after he was born was really hard, but I don't think it has to be that way for everyone. I really think it totally has to do with your childrens' personalities. My oldest was an easy baby, but started transitioning into an insanely difficult toddler at about 12 months (3 months before brother was born). Kade (#2) is now a super easy toddler, but as a baby had really bad reflux and was just hurting all the time even though his actual demeanor was a happy one. So - with a hurting baby and a very demanding toddler, I was in a tough spot for quite a while. BUT - I really think it all comes down to the personalities of the children. If all I had right now was my easy #2 and my super easy #3, I would be cruising through life and maybe thinking about getting pregnant again in the next year or so . . . But, considering my still very difficult and strong-willed #1, I don't think we'll be ready any time soon.

Best of luck figuring it all out. Luckily, Heavenly Father knows way more than anything our logic could ever figure out, and if we ask, he'll help us know. That's definitely the best way to go about making the choice of when to add to the fam. (And, come to find out, if it's right for your family, but you're not ready to hear that, he'll make it happen anyways :) )

katie said...

1. first labor about 14 hours
2. i was induced at 41 weeks. he just didn't mind being cramped i guess, but i did :)
3. pit makes contractions hurt more and they are more intense. get them to give you some pain meds while you are waiting for the epidural. fentanyl works magic... i got my epidural about 4hours after my induction got going. don't even consider not getting one. for anyone who goes natural by choice... i think you are an idiot.
4. complete recovery: i felt better as soon as i had my baby because i could breathe, enjoy food, and sleep when the baby slept. after that i would say each month i felt substantially better in some way. i felt pretty great after 6 months. i'm still tired more than i used to be and my baby is almost 10 months old.
5. ummm, nursing killed! i had a really hard time w/ the painfulness of it all. it got better after a month and didn't hurt at all after 2 months. then he got teeth at 6 months and thought my nipples were awesome teething rings. i weaned completely this last month and he is doing great. he got one bottle of pumped breastmilk everyday from day one so he never had a "won't take the bottle" thing. i recommend it. the lactation ladies say to wait which is fine too, but they won't be as willing to take a bottle and you'll have to kind of battle it, but stick to your guns if you want to have anytime where you don't want to nurse in public and just want the bottle.
7. i'm w/in a few pounds of my preprego weight, but it is true that you have a different body. i comfort myself that i just have more muscle on my arms from lugging that carseat around places and that is why i am a few pounds above where i was before :). the best advice ever though was to not look at yourself naked for 3 months... otherwise you may cry/be grossed out/... etc and you can't do too much about it right away anyway because you are way too tired to go running or something. after about 4 or 5 months i had the energy to workout hard again, but seriously it was soo so so so so HARD to get back in shape and i'm not even in stellar shape... just can make it through a class at the gym.
7. my baby was a good sleeper. he slept 6 hour stretches after about a month. he still wakes up once at night to have a bottle and then goes right back to sleep. best advice: read Healthy sleep habits happy child and follow it! after about 4 months ben went from going to bed at 11 and sleeping until 6 or 7 (with a night feeding) to going to bed at 7 and sleeping until 6 or7 with one night feeding. plus he still takes 2 good naps a day. i love that book. i think every new mom really needs to have a sleep strategy for their new baby. having a plan is totally empowering.
8. ben has slept by himself in his own crib and room since we came home from the hospital. we have a baby monitor and keep the doors open. it's not hard to hear him at all and i think it helped his sleep habits. if you got a bassinet for him to sleep in your room. i think that would be fun for about a month or maybe 2. i just didn't get one. it would be sweet to have them so close though.
9. i don't get bored w/ ben, but i have lots of friends w/ babies and i work about 2-3 times a month. i have really loved motherhood and being home w/ him. he is my little buddy! i really do love it, but i do have friends that have had colicky babies that have been pretty frustrated and bored at times. don't feel like you are not cut out for motherhood if you feel this way though. i think way too many women feel guilty. i'd be going crazy too if my baby cried 24/7, but i got lucky and he is a smiley little munchkin!
10. i have had one baby didn't have a c-section.

tracy, i'm so excited for you! you are going to do great!